Three people walk into a bar…

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Fill In the Blank.”

Three people walk into a bar…

In for a pleasant evening away from the wives, bosses and mortgages. You know, away from the jailers basically. Three random people. Three random lives about to turn into one of the craziest adventures ever.

Perched next to each other on the squeaky barstools, trying to drown their sorrows in a whisky, a beer and a diet coke respectively. Wait a minute! DIET COKE! DIE…effin’ T…COKE!?!

‘I ASKED FOR A LIBERAL SPRINKLING OF SOMETHING POTENT YOU…YOU….’ Spluttered Number 3.

Numbers 1 and 2 swivel squeakily to look at the ranting party and try to pacify him. Matters get worse and before long, the two of them are getting their asses handed to them by Number 3. He had always wanted to do this and if he squinted, one of them looked like that creep who his daughter was dating.

Kick after satisfying kick, crunch after morbid crunch. Within no time at all, Numbers 1 and 2 are moaning for mercy, the women drew closer in lusty curiosity and the men hung around in obvious envy. Number 3 was the hero. The spotlight was on him. After a longish, stunned pause there was a clamour to pay for his drink. ‘THE BILL! THE BILL! PAY THE BILL!’ They yelled.

Suddenly he felt a sharp rap on his arm.

He blinked.

He blinked and looked around.

There he was. Still on the barstool, still with the full glass of flat diet coke in front him. The only thing that had changed was the bartender’s expression. Quite peeved and not in the least bit pleased.

‘This is a bar not your bedroom man! Pay the BILL! GO HOME…’

‘I slept off?’, thought Number 3. ‘Must have been more tired than I imagined!’

Leaving exact change at the bar, he slipped off the stool and made his way out. As the door opened, darkness and anonymity swallowed him whole. He was nobody’s hero. Just a very sleepy man.

So here we go again

Three people walk into a bar….and nothing happens 🙂

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